Forward!

I was standing in the cardiovascular recovery unit the other day in an unusual state of relaxation when I heard the noise of the chopper.  Our hospital helipad is brand-new, so I went running like a child, to see if I could see the helicopter take off. I was just in time to see it float upward off the helipad, and straight up into the air, powerful and beautiful.  As I, and a number of other staff stood by the window, the helicopter continued to go straight up.  It hovered there, on display for all of us to see…a glorious, gleaming machine.  Then, with a smooth, but distinct change by the hand of the pilot we could not see, it stopped rising, tipped its nose down, and began to go forward.  As I watched, it’s speed increased, and soon it was gone, flying into the evening sky, just beginning to darken. Now that we are using the helipad for actual transfers, we can assume that each time it takes off, it is bearing precious cargo, perhaps a child or a person who needs a heart transplant, to a specialty hospital in Indianapolis or Chicago.

“It gives me the chills,” another nurse told me, and I understand. If it were my child, or my dad being flown urgently, what would it be like to see that helicopter rise?

I went back to the recovery unit. Rick, one of those people who knows everything, was telling helicopter stories when I left.

I moved on in my work and not long after, was battling discouragement and anger. They’re so common… The hurtful phrases or looks, the stinging remarks. We all hurt each other, a lot. Not only do we receive hurt, but we cause hurt. I’ve been the one, far too often, God forgive me! -to snap a sarcastic phrase, to gloat triumphantly and unjustly, to ignore someone because they caused me pain (or, just because I was hurting!), to curl deep inside my shell in self-protection mode.

I was thinking of these things, begging God for clarity, as I silently held pressure on an oozy vein in critical care. When I was done, I peeled off my gloves and left, heading straight to Panda Express. It’s called frustration eating, I fear, although it was time for a meal. I parked so I could eat my chicken and spring rolls in safety, and that’s when I decided to call Rick.

“Only if you’re not busy,” I said.  “It’s not about a patient. I just have a question about… helicopters.”

I hadn’t been able to get it out of my mind, the beauty and power of that chopper, dangling suspended above the brand-new helipad. But there was something more in my mind than just metal and mechanics.

“Sure,” he said.

“I noticed that when the helicopter took off, it went straight up first before heading out. Why?”

Rick explained things to me with a lot of terminology I’m too shaky on to repeat safely… Rotors, retreating blades, lift, German manufacturing companies, and helicopter brands (BK1-17?).

But it was as I thought. The helicopter rises straight up first and hovers above its pad, as a safety measure. To begin its forward flight, it must tip it’s head down, a somewhat dangerous move, which could be disastrous if it was too close to the ground or buildings.

“This hovering is a fuel-hungry maneuver,” he explained. “Forward flight is so much more efficient.”

How could he read my mind?

How often in my Christian life, have I wasted energy when I might have been moving forward!  After an offense, how often have I found myself hovering in one place, obsessing over whether I am “safe”, or whether the hurt I am feeling is just! How often have I focused on the commotion around me and never gotten high enough above the fray to be efficient at caring for the wounded around me! How much fuel and energy have I consumed, thinking only of myself and my own sanity, ignoring the touch of the Pilot, when I might have been tipping my head forward, beginning a journey of compassion and healing!

Perhaps we even encourage others to hover sometimes, wanting to see them up close, wanting to see their beauty. (Please don’t go on the mission field when we need you here on our committee… Don’t miss out on the fun to stay with your little children or your elderly relative…. Don’t study, when you could be eating pizza…). We want to hold on to the beauty of the talents and character of the people around us, hoarding it to ourselves, forgetting that beauty in the kingdom of God is all about spending that beauty in His service! In the kingdom of God, there is no beauty in showing that you are powerful enough to hover in one place. There is only beauty in responding to the nudge of the Pilot, in speeding the souls in your life to places of hope.

Yes, we need to be safe first, to know we are secure in Christ ourselves… But Father, forgive me for the hours, days, or years wasted beating the air in one place, re-hashing issues, focusing on myself, trying to serve in my own strength, or unable to let offenses go! Help me to rise quickly from my surroundings, to humble myself at the foot of the cross, and by the power and efficiency of His blood across my ever-inefficient heart, move forward into the darkening night.